i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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