forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
