just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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