I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
