We won't sleep together?
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize
