oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize
