Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Randomize
