You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I take back everything I said about communal showers
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize