No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
