you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
