Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
