I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
We are two peas in an std pod
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
