; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
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