Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Randomize
