I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Randomize
