At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
