I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
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