My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
