Three words: puerto rican gang bang
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize