your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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