I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Randomize
