Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
No subtext here. People are naked.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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