"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
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