WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Found your dick twin last night
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
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