Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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