he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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