I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
Randomize
