happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
I want to fling myself into the sun
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Randomize
