are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
honey bunches of taint.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Randomize
