You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
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