Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Randomize
