she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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