apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
