Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize
