you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
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