the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I could have mohawked her pubes.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
