You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
