Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize