it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Randomize
