And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I think I died a long time ago.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
Randomize