Im at strip club and am horny
I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
if you like me you must not know who I am
Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
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