great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Randomize
