it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Randomize