yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
My life is pants optional.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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