Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
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