I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize