I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
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