I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Randomize
