Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
Randomize
