So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Randomize