using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
Randomize